Multiple Tank Syndrome, or MTS as it's commonly called among aquarists, is a catch-all term for the fish-obsessed. 'Gone Fishing' takes on a whole new meaning, as those who have it are entirely dedicated to the fishy life and are always thinking about the next tank they're designing, the next fish they're going to add.
So how do you know if you have MTS? Here's a quick checklist:
- Do you have a fish tank (or two, or three, or more) in every room?
- Have you run out of floor space and started installing tanks in your walls?
- Do you have excess tanks and equipment in your closets, attic, or car? Under and on your kitchen table? (Severe cases may require building a shed or garage, renting a storage unit, or possibly moving to/building a larger house.)
- Do you have so many tanks, you've started disassembling them for sump parts?
- Is your sink/bathtub full of buckets, fish nets, and other accessories?
- Do your sink faucets have permanent python attachments? (Severe cases may require re-plumbing your entire house for easier water changes.)
- Are you unable to pass up a great deal on a tank, ever?
- When you are setting up a new tank, are you already planning your next one?
- When you go out to sell a fish, do you come home with two more?
- Does your fish store know you by name?
- Are your hands permanently wrinkled from being in the water?
- Are you unable to sleep without the sound of running water?
- Do you push tanks on your friends so you have someone to talk to and trade with?
- Do you know how to brace a floor to support more tanks?
- Do you know how to build your own tanks and sumps, and can plumb or reseal a tank in your sleep?
- Do you walk into a fish store or aquarium, count their tanks, and go 'Is this all they've got?'
- Have you ever thought that opening your own fish store might be a good idea?
There is no cure. Once you've got it, you can never have enough, because tanks are like potato chips: You can never stop at just one!
Do you have MTS yet...? How many tanks do you have...?